The Tostenson's

FIRST OF ALL-Let me say-I'm SORRY for being so absent!

There has been a BIG change in our life and a change that has made me soooooo tired-We found out on February 27, 2010 that we would be welcoming another baby into our family. This was a total shock, but a happy shock. It's a baby-how can one not be happy!

I told Nick by starting a scrapbook for the baby. One I planned to keep up on, but again-that fell through! I wanted to take pictures weekly of myself, but everytime Sunday rolled and my week would change and I would think about it, I just didn't want to get up and take a picture. I feel bad and really wish I would have kept on it, but sadly I didn't this time around.

As soon as I found out, I had to start the normal doctor appointments that I have had to do with both Julia and Isaiah, after we lost our first baby. I have to go in every couple days to make sure my HCG level is doubling. I was also put on progesterone. Fun stuff! ;)

At 6 weeks 3 days, we had an ultra sound. I am pretty sure it looks just like a little blob at that time :) (sorry our scanner isn't working and I can't get the screen on the camera working to really take good pictures-so these are as good as I could get!)

Things were going well, or as well as a first trimester could go! I had (well still have) nausea, vomitting, and have been EXTREMELY exhausted. Exhaustion is why I haven't been on here to update. By the time I would get home from work, I couldn't imagine trying to sit at the computer and think and blog. I am sorry I let so much time pass.

Then things drastically changed-and not for the better-but for the worse!

On Friday April 23, 2010 I was sitting on the couch and felt something, something I knew I shouldn't be feeling. I ran to the bathroom to find out I was right-This was not supposed to be happening. I was bleeding, bright red blood! I thought the worst, right then and there. Been there, done that and I looked at Nick and said, "Here we go again!" I called the after hours number for my doctor and my dr was not on call, so the one that was called me back and said to get to the ER for an ultra sound.

I went to change clothes quickly and went to use the restroom again right before we left-the bleeding was done, everything was clear. I still knew I had to go, bright red blood is not a good sign during pregnancy.

At the ER, I had blood tests done, urine analysis done (to check for an infection), an ultra sound done, and other not so fun tests. The news I got that night was the baby looked great!!! (Which is very GOOD.) We saw it kicking, waving, the heart was just fluttering away. Here is a picture from the ultra sound at 11 weeks 5 (or 6) days! Sure has changed from about 5 weeks ago, huh?!

The BAD news I got was that a I had a large placental separation. I was told that it wasn't the end of the road for me, but that I was at higher risk of a miscarriage or pre-term labor. I just bawled. I told the doctor that, that if I was going to end up losing this baby, I wanted it sooner than later, I by all means do NOT want to lose it, but I also don't want to get further and further along, only to lose it. She said she completely understood, but I had to change my thinking. I had to think positive, that they do see very happy endings with these things.

So I had an appt that following Monday where my doctor put my on bed-rest. At that time she told me at least 2 weeks possibly longer. She said they see a lot of times between 14-16 weeks the placenta re-attaching itself and that's what we were hoping for.

I went for another ultra sound yesterday. The Baby still looks great...

13 weeks 1 Day

HOWEVER...I have a large blood clot under the placenta from when it tore, it bled. The dr said that it could re-absorb itself in me or release. He said he sees the large separation and he couldn't tell me if it was any better from the ultra sound before, b/c this doctor was just going to do the US for the ultra screen for down syndrome testing, etc. He said he would send the results to my OB and she would know if it looked any better. He wants to see me in 6 weeks and make sure the clot is getting smaller and the separation is less. (At first they ran across the idea that I originally had 2 sacs and actually miscarried a twin and this one was fine, but after the further review, he put that idea to rest-for sure only one sac, my placenta was separated.)

I then saw my OB-at that point she had not received the results yet (the appt was RIGHT afterwards.) She too could not tell me if there was any progress. She sat me down and said, I want you to know your separation was large and I am very worried. She said, to keep praying b/c it is not over yet and we're going to do all we can to have it reattach it self. She said she sees a lot where they do, but again emphasized, "but yours is very large." I am on bed-rest for another 2 weeks, then another US. We will see where we go from there. Hopefully some progress. It is possible that I will be on rest for the remainder of the time. I am 13 weeks-that could be A LONG time-but worth it, if I get to see a healthy baby after this.

I have not had any bleeding or old blood since that one incident. I am still throwing up every day. I still have a lot of signs of pregnancy. But the separations SCARES ME!!!

Please keep me and the baby in your thoughts and prayers. We really need it.